Thursday, March 4, 2010

The Flying Tomato

I went in for a "trim" two weeks ago, and came out with the Worst Haircut of My Life. Worse even, than the Double Haircut Debacle of 2000 (if you knew me then, you would know what I was talking about). I've been trying to live with it for the past two weeks, and I can keep silent no longer.

Dear Jade (yes that's her real name),

I am seething angry at you for completely sabotaging my attempt to grow out my hair. You used your fancy lingo, tools, and products to mask this horrendous cut until I washed my hair and apparently "undid" anything remotely positive about this haircut. It is hideous. I am officially breaking up with you.

Good day. -Michaela

My worst fears were affirmed last night, when I vented to Gary for the 209th time since this incident, and then he innocently asks, "What exactly did you tell her you wanted?" WHAT?! I assure you it wasn't this mess. Yes, Jade, you see me, being a brunette young-ish mother, I would sincerely like to look just like Shaun White... pretty pretty please. Are you kidding?! I said, and I quote..." I just want a trim", and I walked out with bangs that go around the entire perimeter of my head. I can't even ride out the next few months of growing it out with a ponytail... because my circular bangs are too short.

Seriously... just throw an American flag around my shoulders and call me Shaun.

Jade, let's hope, for your sake, we don't meet in a dark alley. I'm pretty scrappy.
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3 comments:

Erin said...

Oh dear. And I though my most recent haircut was pretty bad. I'm sorry you have circular bangs around your head :( You still have the prettiest eyes and smile so you can out shine that haircut.

Would headbands help? Bobby pins?

indywriter said...

Oh dear... a Very Bad Haircut happened to me once in high school. I wore a bucket hat all summer. Every day started the same: 1. Wake up. 2. Put on hat. 3. Spend day coveting other people's normal hair.

I should also note, that this bad haircut happened in conjunction with a bad perm.

I suggest a bunch of cute hats!

Got It From My Mama said...

I am sure everyone has had a haircut that they didn't ask for or want my mum used to say to me it's only bad for a week and then it grows our yeah right. Can i just say i love the colour of your hair.

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